Why singles should slow down.

Too often, singles fill their lives with friends, activities and vocations to combat their loneliness.

I will be the first to admit that this happens. I know some of you are saying, "I'm not lonely." Let me also be the first to tell you that you're not being honest with yourself. The more we inundate ourselves with draining relationships, pointless studies and slave labor, the less room we're going to have to nurture a relationship. Allow me to explain:

Friendships: Many singles tend to make a LOT of friends after a break-up. The truth is that all of the companionship you once enjoyed is now gone. Consequently, we attempt to fill the void by initiating friendships with anyone who will give us the time of day. You'll also re-kindle all of those friendships that you had before. So, what's the harm?

"As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend." Proverbs 27:17 (NLT)

Are you making and maintaining the right friendships? Do these people lift you up? Do they support you? Do they encourage you? Or do you spend the majority of your time together huffing on the end of a RediWhip can and leaving brown paper-bags on doorsteps? It's better to be alone than in the wrong relationship. This goes for friends, too. When you meet someone, it's a natural fact that you won't spend as much time with your friends (but you'll still make time for them). True friendships pick-up right where they left off. Make sure that you leave enough of your heart prepared to share with someone special.

Activities: Singles tend to have about 50 hobbies at any given time. We'll also start using our mental muscle to absorb all of the information around us. We'll read books we don't enjoy or understand, sign up for that underwater basket-weaving class at the local community college and blog continuously. So, what's the big deal?

"Be careful how you think; your life is shaped by your thoughts." Proverbs 4:23 (GN)

Are we really feeding our minds or are we distracting them from the right thoughts? A quiet and peaceful mind is much more beneficial in a relationship than a tired, busy one. Don't fill your schedule with empty tasks.

Vocations: A lot of singles bury themselves in work to keep their thoughts and emotions from dealing with the single-life. We essentially never learn to deal with the issue. We pour the better years of our lives into a job. In most cases, it's to pad someone's bank-account - not to help and minister to others. Whose approval are we seeking? Our boss? Our own? Our peers? The money?

"But seek (aim at and strive after) first of all His Kingdom and His righteousness (His way of doing and being right) and then all these things taken together will be given you besides" Matthew 6:33 (AMP)

I certainly don't want the company logo on my tombstone. I want to leave my mark in this world by the number of people I helped and loved - not the sales I generated or the costs I cut.

My point: Granted, when I meet that special-someone, my friends will see a little less of me, the blogs will slow and I'll quit my job (okay, probably not). However, be careful of the company you keep, the things you do and the job that is NOT your life. Always be ready for what God has next for you. If you're not careful, you might miss it. It's okay to be single. It's okay to slow down.

Goodnight,

James